Finally, a candle that matches your aesthetic while smelling like the one thing you claim to hate: a suburban bakery. The Blackheart Way Scented Candle is for those who want their apartment to look like a Victorian séance but smell like a fresh batch of sugar cookies. It’s the ultimate olfactory identity crisis in a 13.75oz glass jar.
Why You Need This (To Mask Your Existential Dread)
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Deceptive Vanilla Bean Scent: It smells like "Vanilla Bean," which is basically the "Live, Laugh, Love" of scents—except it’s wrapped in a Blackheart label, so no one has to know you’re actually a softie.
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13.75oz of Pure Irony: Large enough to last through a marathon of sad indie movies or a particularly long bout of staring at the ceiling.
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Aromatic Home Decor: It looks great on a bookshelf next to books you haven’t read and that one dead succulent you forgot to water for three months.
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The "Vibe" Shift: Perfect for when you want to lure people into your lair with the promise of baked goods, only to hit them with your 45-minute lecture on why the void is actually a comforting place.
Candle Safety (Because We Don't Need Another Disaster)
If you treat this candle like you treat your responsibilities—by walking away and hoping it fixes itself—you’re going to have a bad time. Follow these steps:
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Trim the Wick: Keep it short. A long wick is like your ego—unnecessarily large and prone to creating a mess.
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Don’t Leave it Unattended: Like your toxic ex, this thing shouldn't be left alone in a room. Keep an eye on it so it doesn't burn your life down.
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Burn on Heat-Resistant Surfaces: Don’t put this directly on your thrifted velvet table. Use a coaster. We’re trying to be edgy, not "homeless because of a vanilla candle."
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Stop at the Bottom: Once there's only half an inch of wax left, let it go. It’s over. Move on. Just like you should have done with that one phase in 2014.
| |
13.75oz |
| Height, in |
5.00 |
| Diameter, in |
3.00 |
